A Arte de Perdoar

Rosh Hashanah, o ano novo judeu, comeca segunda-feira a noite. Como em todo ano novo, esta e uma chance para recomecos. E recomecar, muitas vezes involve perdoar - ambos dando e recebendo. Nenhum dos dois e facil, mas ambos estao em nossa capacidade.

Perdoar alguem significa que achamos forcas para ir alem de nos mesmos, a um lugar que nos ajuda a ver aqueles que nos feriram com novos olhos. Isso nunca e facil. Buscar perdao requer de nos o confronto com o passado; ver o que fizemos de errado e nos comprometermos a mudar nosso comportamento. Isso e grande. Isso e imenso. Da mesma forma que somos capazes de perdoar os outros,  tambem somos capazes de pedir por perdao. 

Nao existe nada que nao possa ser perdoado. Entao nao deixemos o medo do que fizemos, ou o rancor pelo que nos fizeram, nos fazer desistir de procurar ou oferecer perdao.

Nao tente consertar o mundo. Nos apenas podemos perdoar aqueles que nos feriram e pedir perdao aqueles a quem ferimos.

Mantenha o equilibrio. O numero de perdoes que procuramos deve ser proporcional ao numero de perdoes que estamos dispostos a oferecer: porque o ato de perdoar alimenta o ato de ser perdoado. E a lei do retorno.

Saiba que voce nunca esta sozinho. Da perspectiva de Deus, o esforco sincero de corrigir o passado nos garante a chance de recomecar.

Honre seu passado mas nao se deixe aprisionar por ele. Nao permita que o medo de esquecer o que foi feito a voce o impeca de perdoar aqueles que lhe feriram.

Permita que o amor triunfe sobre a razao. Sempre existira um bom motivo para continuar agindo da mesma maneira, ou para impedir que voce perdoe. Mas a verdadeira prova e saber se voce tem ou nao amor suficiente dentro de si para ir alem da razao.

Simplifique. Peca desculpas ou perdoe. Uma coisa de cada vez. Sempre existirao outros motivos, mas nao e o momento de explora-los.

Nem sempre o "sim" e a resposta. Nao e sempre que estamos preparados para perdoar. Isso nao e fim do mundo, nem faz de nos pessoas indignas. Mas a resposta nao deve, tambem, ser sempre "nao". Considere o que voce perde dizendo "nao", e se preocupe se esta for sempre a "sua" resposta.

Lembre-se de que o perdao nao e o fim do processo, mas o comeco de um novo nivel de relacionamento que, talvez, continue a ser moldado pelos atos que levaram ao perdao.

Celebre o momento do perdao de alguma maneira que recompense ambos a quem procura o perdao e aquele que o oferece. Um abraco, um beijo, talvez algo mais intimo. Uma bebida, ou uma comida compartilhada. Seja o que for, ambos realizaram uma grande coisa, entao celebre isso.

Shanah Tovah


Katia Grigsby 2008 © All Rights Reserved

Traveling through history - Transcript

Last night I traveled through history. I saw something which has never seen before. And I am so glad I did. A African-American man chosen as the Democratic presidential candidate. I traveled through history and saw the American dream come alive. As a new American, I got a glimpse of the American spirit. I watched America rally - with great emotion - behind a man that nobody (14 months ago) knew could draw such a crowd. Where else in the world is it possible to witness such a spectacle? Where else in the world could this happen during an election? Last night I visited history, but I also visited America.

Barack Obama's acceptance speech at Invesco Field in Denver, Colorado, was quite a spectacle. Seats were snapped up, in true rock star fashion, within 24 hours. Phone lines were jammed. Automated answers suggested the hotline wasn't working properly - but the problem was simply that volunteers couldn't keep up with the demand. In the end, 84,000 people got tickets. Those who couldn't get in were put on a waiting list.

84,000 people traveled from all over the country to hear the 47-year-old Illinois senator speak. 'America, now is not the time for small plans,' Obama said to the heaving stadium, upon accepting his party's nomination. It is, he announced, a time to renew America's promise. It was the anniversary of Martin Luther King's 'I have a dream' speech, and we were traveling back in time - but also forward.

And the crowd was with him, wanting to believe in that promise. The crowd inside and out of the stadium. The crowds watching him in Time Square, an those of us watching on our televisions.

'That promise,' he went on, 'is our greatest inheritance. It's a promise I make to my daughters when I tuck them in at night, and a promise that you make to yours - a promise that has led immigrants to cross oceans and pioneers to travel west; a promise that led workers to picket lines, and women to reach for the ballot.

'And is that promise that forty five years ago today, brought Americans from every corner of this land to stand together on a Mall in Washington, before Lincoln's Memorial, an hear a young preacher from georgia speak of his dream.

'The men and women who gathered there could've heard many things. They could've heard words of anger and discord. They could've been told to succumb to the fear and frustration of so many dreams deferred.

'But what the people heard instead - people of every creed and color, from every walk of life - is that in America, our destiny is inextricably linked. That together, our dreams can be one.'

Last night I met Americans I really liked. This is America as it should be. VL Traveling through history

Images: barackobama.com, demconvention.com

I SAW A FENCE IN THE LAND OF THE FREE….

Once I saw the fence while wandering and getting lost, as I always do, driving with or without directions, and almost crossed the border (uma puta fronteira) without carrying my passport.

It is an ugly steel like concrete wall, gray and shameful, dividing people that are equals, who speaks the same language, given that in California, 35.9% of the population is formed by "latinos" and look alike. Not to mention that from the beds of the Rio Grande/Rio Bravo to the mountains of Utah once was Mexico's territory.

I saw the fence in broad daylight with cameras and wires watching the shiny (well, not so shiny) San Diego and the slums of Tijuana. 

Please correct me if I am mistaken, but the world didn't put down what was suppose to be the last division: the Berlin Wall, in 1979? And now the government who wants the world to believe it is the icon of democracy is building a barrier to keep other citizens out? Are we really in the twenty=first century? Do they really think that a fence is going to prevent desperate people driven by poverty and hunger to pursue their dreams of a better life? All this noise and our tax dollars spent on this shame are not going to stop the human creativity. Since late 70s there has been fences. Along the Arizona-Sonora border, locals from both sides have used their creativity to turn the evil around. They enjoy volleyball matches against each other. So the fence was no longer a barrier but also a volleyball net.

It just shows how people can overcome the difficulties, how they can transform situations and be creative. Government has to admit that both teams are playing at home, with the fence as the net.

Fences and walls don't stop people. The U.S. - Mexican border has the highest number of both legal and illegal crossings of any land border in the world. 

While heavily regulated and policed, it is occasionally given over to playful uses. On the San Diego-Tijuana crossing, human cannonball David Smith was once blasted over the border fence from a beach in Tijuana into a safety net set up on the California side of the border.

Last week I crossed the border to go to Tijuana to see a Manu Chao concert. It was a very nice concert and I had a great time as always happen when I have the opportunity to see Manu Chao. Before I got there though I went thru some unpleasant experience of trying to invite people to go with me. I say unpleasant because of the reaction of some people when I mentioned that the concert would be in Tijuana. Some people replied that they wouldn't "risk" going to Mexico. Some even told me they wouldn't go there because they were "white" (!?!). Then I realized I am fortunate enough to not allow the color of my skin stop me going to places and interacting with other fellow human beings. I felt sorry and ashamed for those people who thinks the color of their skin makes them better than me or someone else. And I said to myself: Thanks God you don't want to go, because I don't to be around you. Thanks, but no Thank You!!!

Katia Grigsby Photography 2008 © All Rights Reserved

I could go on and on about the ignorance of those people, but politics and racism aside, I crossed the border that Sunday with my American passport (This time I had it with me) and went to see Manu Chao. Nobody bother to even look at me, as I am a citizen of the world. I don't define people by the color of their skin or nationality. I just want to exercise my right of going and come on the Land of the Free. I was just an ordinary person in the crowd, the way is suppose to be, as we are all brothers and sisters.
So I hope and pray that if you find a fence in your way you do as I do: trespass your own fences as much as possible, putting down your own boundaries.

Sometimes other's people fences gets in may (as it happen with my invitation). When it happen I often get around it or over it. Usually coming face to face with a fence is simply another worthwhile experience. May you put your own fences down too and ideally, of course, the world will maintain an open-door policy.

Katia Grigsby 2008 © All Rights Reserved

Imagine Me (Imagine Eu)

Katia Grigsby Photography 2008 © All Rights Reserved

Imagine a woman who believes it is right and good she is a woman.

(Imagine uma mulher que acredita ser certo e maravilhoso que ELA e uma mulher.)

A woman who honors her experiences and tell her stories.

(Uma mulher que honra suas experiencias e conta suas historias.)

Who refuses to carry the sins of others within her body and life.

(Que se nega a carregar a culpa dos outros em seu corpo e vida.)

Imagine a woman who believes she is good.

(Imagine uma mulher que acredita que ela e uma  pessoa decente.)

A woman who trusts and respect herself.

(Uma mulher que respeita e confia em si mesma.)

Who listens to her needs and desires, and met them

(Que escuta as suas proprias necessidades e desejos, e os satisfaz)

With tenderness and grace.

(Com graca e ternura.)

Imagine a woman who has acknowledged the past's influence on the present.

(Imagine uma mulher que reconhece a influencia do passado no presente.)

A woman who has walked through her past.

(Uma mulher que caminhou atraves do seu passado.)

Who has healed into the present.

(Que sobreviveu dentro do presente.)

Imagine a woman who authors her own life.

(Imagine uma mulher que escreve sua propria vida.)

A woman who exerts, initiates, and moves on her own behalf.

(Uma mulher que se esforca, toma iniciativas e age em seu proprio nome.)

Who refuses to surrender except to her truest self and to her wisest voice.

(Que se nega a se render, exceto ao seu verdadeiro eu e a sua sabia voz.)

Imagine a woman who names her own gods.

(Imagine uma mulher que elege seus proprios deuses.)

A woman who imagines the divine in her image and likeness.

(Uma mulher que ve o divino em sua propria imagem.)

Who designs her own spirituality and allows it to inform her daily life.

(Que desenha sua propria espiritualidade e permite que ela guie sua vida diaria.)

Imagine a woman in love with her own body.

(imagine uma mulher em paz com seu corpo.)

A woman who believes her body is enough, just as it is.

(Uma mulher que acredita que seu corpo e suficiente, apenas da maneira que e.)

Who celebrates her body and its rhythms and cycles as an exquisite resource.

(Que celebra seu corpo, com seus ritmos e ciclos, como uma exotica possibilidade.)

Imagine a woman who honors the face of the Goddess in her changing face.

(Imagine uma mulher que honra a face da Deusa em sua propria mutante face.)

A woman who celebrates the accumulation of the years and her wisdom. 

(Uma mulher que celebra a acumulacao dos anos e sua sabedoria.)

Who refuses to use precious energy disguising the changes in her body

(Que se nega a usar preciosa energia tentando disfarcar a mudancas em seu corpo)

And life.

(E vida.)

Imagine Me!

(Imagine Eu!)

Poem of Maya Angelou

A WOMAN SHOULD... By Maya Angelou

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE

enough money within her control to move out

and rent a place of her own,

even if she never wants to or needs to...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE

something perfect to wear if the employer,

or date of her dreams,

wants to see her in an hour...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE

a youth she's content to leave behind...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE

a past juice enough that she's looking forward to

retelling it in her old age...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE

a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE

one friend who always makes her laugh and one who lets her cry...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE

a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her

family...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE

eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems,

and a recipe for a meal

that will make her guests feel honored...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE

a feeling control over her destiny...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW

how to fall in love without loosing herself...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW

how to quit a job,

break up with a lover,

and confront a friend without 

ruining the friendship...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW

when to try harder, and when to walk away...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW

that she can't change the length of her calves,

the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW

that her childhood may not have been perfect, but it's over...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW

what she would and wouldn't do for love or more...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW

how to live alone, even if she doesn't like it...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW

whom she can trust,

whom she can't,

and why she shouldn't take it personally...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW

where to go...

be it to her best friend's kitchen table, or a 

charming Inn in the woods

when her soul needs 

shooting...

Be yourself... everyone else is already taken

Maya Angelou

A

Price of the Sex Around the world

Condom Prices Around the World - Transcritp 

+ ENLARGE - (BECAUSE SIZE MATTERS)

For obvious reasons you can't recycle a condom, but you ever wonder which countries "tax" sex the most?

Well... Environmental Graffiti has decided to create a detailed graphical diagram, complete with wallpaper download for your viewing pleasure. The data, which gives the average condom price around the world has been compiled from UK price comparison site pricerunner and a blogger from an interesting little site called condomunity. We thought we'd go one step further however, and create a graphic representation of the findings - I think you'll agree the graph makes for "interesting" view.

When looking at it, please don't deduce that bar heights are correlated to penis size (that's just offensive).

Shangai came out the cheapest with an average price of just $4.50, whilst Ireland was the country where sex costs most (!) at almost $18 on average for a pack - (perhaps due to the hostility of the Catholic Church towards contraception?). Prices within the US showed a high amount of variation, from $9.50 in Houston to nearly $15 in New York - feel free to extrapolate from that what you wish...

Condoms can't be recycled and as such may be considered damaging o the environment. And the solution offered for most things that either cannot be recycled or damage the environment? Tax. Petrol, plastic bags (soon), driving in central London, all cost at a premium. But putting a price on sex? Well that's just cheap...

VITORIOSA

Katia Grigsby Photography 2007 © All Rights Reserved

"Quero sua risada mais gostosa; esse seu jeito de achar que a vida pode ser maravilhosa. Quero sua alegria es-can-da-lo-sa; vitoriosa por nao ter vergonha de aprender como se goza... Quero sua pouca castidade, quero sua louca liberdade, quero toda essa vontade de passar dos seus limites, e ir alem." Ivan Lins

Enquanto nao nos comprometemos, ha hesitacao, a possibilidad

e de recuarmos e sempre a ineficiencia. Exis

te uma verdade elementar para todos os atos de iniciativa e criacao que e a ignorancia (que acaba com inumeros planos e ideias esplendidas), de que no momento em que nos comprotemos definitivamente, "a providencia tambem se poe em movimento". Todos os tipos de coisas comecam a acontecer para ajudar-nos; coisas que de outra forma jamais ocorreriam. Toda uma corrente de acontecimentos emana da decisao, trazendo em nosso favor incidentes, encontros e assistencia mat

Katia Grigsby Photography 2007 © All Rights Reserved

erial inesperados, com os quais nenhum homem jamais poderia ter sonhado. Voce pode dar inicio a tudo que possa fazer ou sonhar; a audacia tem dentro de si o genio, a forca e a magica. Comece agora.

J. Goethe

Amantes com coracoes confusos, confundem amantes com coracoes abertos

Katia Grigsby Photography 2007 © All Rights Reserved

Amantes com coracoes confusos, confundem amantes com coracoes abertos. KG

puerto vallarta, Mexico, April 2008

FOOD FOR THE SOUL

Katia Grigsby Photography 2007 © All Rights Reserved

And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul. So I take more time to laugh and to play. COMPARTILHAR SEMPRE... Com amigos ou desconhecidos, desenvolvendo o senso de respeito pelo outro eu reduzo meu proprio egoismo e aperfeicoo meu senso de gentileza que e uma fonte natural de generosidade. Essa e a minha simples religiao. Nao ha necessidade de templos, complicadas filosofias. Minha mente, meu coracao sao meu templo; a filosofia e a ternura.

EU

Embora o mundo me condene

Trago na face a inocencia

Muito embora ha quem pense

Que sou mulher de muitas caras.

Eu tenho uns sonhos

Mais conseguidos que acabados

Embora acreditem que eu tenha muitas asas

Sou quase nada

100 Things I Like

1.  Agua, sempre gelada
   
2.  Musica. Escuto sempre, ate dormindo
   
3.  Dias de Chuva
   
4.  Bob Dylan
   
5.  L'eau d'Issey by Issey Myake
   
6.  Bibliotecas
   
7.  Blue Eyes
   
8.  Trovoada
   
9.  Minha Ruivinha
   
10.  Beijo na nuca
    
11.  Bar do Reggae in Canoa Quebrada
    
12.  Tapioca
    
13.  Viajar, viajar, viajar
    
14. Speaking other languages
15. Alimentar as pessoas
16. Meu bife a milaneza com molho branco
17. Italy
18. Johnny Deep
19. History
20. Receber email
21. Dar presentes
22. Pastel de Arraya
23. Baileys
24. As praias do Brasil
25. Portugues falado com sotaque estrangeiro
26. Amigos na cozinha
27. My bed
28. Aneis, grandes, exagerados
29. The Big Bang Theory tv series
30. My iPod
31. Chocolate com fruta
32. Caminhar em Ponta Negra
33. Dalai Lama
34. Tom & Jerry
35. As folhas caindo no outono
36. Roupa nova
37. Caetano Veloso e seus comentarios irreverentes; ele pode
38. Dormir sem roupa
39. Coca-Cola
40. Virar a noite em Canoa Quebrada e pegar o sol com a mao
41. A poesia de Pablo Neruda
42. Cheiro de lavanda
43. A risada do meu filho
44. Atitude
45. San Francisco
46. Chile Relleno
47. Roupa de cama branca e cheirosa
48. As historias de Isabel Allende
49. Internet. Isn't it incredible?
50. Aeroportos. Significa que estou indo ou chegando
51. Dancar Salsa
52. Snow
53. Cosmopolitan, the drink
54. Meus amigos. Sem eles nao seria nada, nadinha
55. Filosofia budista
56. Windy country roads
57. Taking pictures
58. Mudanca
59. Escrever
60. Dirigir sem rumo. Me perder e me achar 
61. Puzzles
62. The sound of the ocean
63. Pinguins
64. Cafe, cafe, cafe
65. I like I am intelligent 
66. Manga
67. Memories
68. Pessoas que pensam por elas mesmas 
69. Coragem
70. Pessoas que se indgnam
71. View from the top of the mountains
72. Reciclar
73. Bossa Nova
74. Cantar como uma louca quando dirijo sozinha
75. Watching movies and guessing in what location they're shoot(I usually get them right)
76. Learning
77. Pipoca
78. A cor amarelo
79. Andar de bicicleta
80. Sonhar
81. Christmas
82. Tomar um caminho diferente para ir a um lugar conhecido
83. Richard Gere
84. Cinema
85. Road Trips
86. Cabo San Lucas
87. Crab
88. Soneca
89. Jogo do Brasil em copa do mundo
90. Macarrao
91. Suco de Cajarana
92. Massagem
93. Estar apaixonada
94. All the berries
95. Amyr Klink
96. Algodao Doce
97. Circo
98. Jazz
99. Skank
100. Life. A minha

Today's Mood

"When we look into our own hearts and begin to discover what is confused and what brilliant, what is bitter and what is sweet, it isn't just ourselves that we are discovering. We are discovering the universe."

-Pema Chodron

Robert Grigsby Photography © All Rights Reserved

PIECES OF MY SELF -Reflections on Being a Mother

I'll start from my heart

A place to house my two pieces

They were thrown to the universe like seeds

I tried to provide a good earth so they could grow strong

And after that nothing would be in my control

They would be the positive and the negative

The water and the fire

The gentle wind and the powerful thunder

The two sides of myself

It's a never ending job to be a mother

One is close, the other far away

Both are together where everything started

The heart is bottomless

The love is endless

The taste of "saudade"* cannot be described

By just saying that I miss you both

Katia Grigsby 2006 © All Rights Reserved

Encinitas, CA  05/13/06

*Saudade is a word that alone exists in the Portuguese language. Cannot be translated but only experienced.

IMAGENS

Foto do Dia Siga este link e descubra

VIAJAR

"Um homem precisa viajar. Por sua conta, nao por meio de suas historias, imagens, livros ou TV. Precisa viajar por si, com seus olhos e seus pes, para entender o que e seu. Para um dia plantar as suas proprias arvores e dar-lhes valor. Conhecer o frio para desfrutar do calor. E o oposto. Sentir a distancia e o desabrigo para estar bem sobre o proprio teto. Um homem precisa viajar para lugares que nao conhece, para quebrar essa arrogancia que nos faz ver o mundo como nos o imaginamos, e nao simplesmente como e ou pode ser; que nos faz professores e doutores do que nao vimos, quando deveriamos ser alunos e simplesmente ir ver."

Amyr Klink/Mar Sem Fim

Picture taken in a corn field in Sierra Madre, Nayarit, Mexico
 Katia Grigsby Photography 2008 © All Rights Reserved 

DAILY LESSONS - ACCEPTANCE

Katia Grigsby Photography 2007 © All Rights Reserved

"If we learn to open our hearts, anyone, including the people who drive us crazy, can be our teacher."  Pema Chodron

Have been learning a great deal, exercising patience, taking a deep breath and walking easily through life. Think about...

TO MY FRIENDS

If you read the front page story of the San Francisco Chronicle, you would have read about a female humpback whale who ha become entangled in a spider web of crab traps and lines. 

She was weighted down by hundreds of pounds of traps that caused her to struggle to stay afloat. She also had hundreds of yards of line hope wrapped around her body, her tail, her torso, a line tugging in her mouth.

A fisherman spotted her just east of the Farralone Islands

(outside the Golden Gate) and radioed an environmental group for help.

Within a few hours, the rescue team arrived and determined that she was

so bad off, the only way to save her was to dive and untangle her...

a very dangerous proposition.

One slap could kill a rescuer.

They worked for hours with curved knives and eventually freed her.

When she was free, the divers say she swan in what seemed like joyous circles.

She then came back to each and every diver, one at a time, and nudged them,

pushed gently around - she thanked them. Some said it was the most incredibly beautiful experience of their lives.

The guy who cut the rope out of her mouth says her eyes was following him the whole time, and he will never be the same.

May you, and all those you love,

be so blessed and fortunate...

to be surrounded by people who will help you get untangled

from the things that are binding you.

And, may you always know the joy

of giving and receiving GRATITUDE.

I pass this on to you, my friend, in the same spirit. 

And because, as my daughter says, I have friends to know who I am.

Transcript - San Francisco Chronicle

A DAY WITHOUT A MEXICAN

Katia Grigsby Photography 2007 © All Rights Reserved

This is one of my favorites movies. The productions is hollywoodian, very simple indeed, but delivers its message. It has all together: comedy, drama, reality and make you think (I hope), with all this debate about immigration, on how is easy to stereotype people. I know what I am talking about: as an immigrant myself I am often approached by people trying to speak to me in spanish just because of my feature and skin color; although I'm brazilian and my language is portuguese... And you know what? they get mad at me when I say "I'm sorry, I don't speak spanish"... (which is not true but I see no point to speak another language that is not my own neither of the country that I live in, when there is no need to do so).

My favorite line is "there are the mexicans from Guatemala, the mexicans from El Salvador, and the "regular" mexicans (from Mexico, of course - my comment). Maybe those people think I am a mexican from Brazil.


Katia Grigsby 2008 @ All Rights Reserved